Thursday, September 18, 2008

what in the world happened to me!

Oh gosh.. I suck at blogging! Hands down!
It's been more than a year!
Oh no, wait, it's more than one and a half year!
Look at the dates!
I'm gonna go hide myself in shame..

But then again, oh well, who's watching my blog anyway?

Lets do some catching up, ok..

June 2007 - Jan 2008 ; my most dramatic period in life!
As far as I can recall, my job sucks! and I was treated like dirt at work and felt like a ball, can be easily tossed here and there.
My agm swap my post with another girl for the reason that I can do her job better. Well, yes, I have to admit that she was kinda sick at that time and cannot carry such burden, but as for me, I had zero knowledge at all regarding software and system applications. Hell, I don't even have any education background in it, let alone the working experience. But to cut the story short, I strived my @$s and became a DBA- database administrator within a month. I ultimately done my very best and have exceed in handling the system more than I thought I was capable of. But, honestly, I found no happiness at all in doing this. So, I keep on scouting for other placement. My agm had several times interfered with my quest in finding new post (which I accidentally found about this later after I left the division). And after all my effort in carrying out my job task despite the fact that I hate doing it, my agm just put aside all my effort and rate my career performance as average and not excellent. Must I let u know that he passed down the mandate to both of my managers (1st and 2nd quarter year) to change my high rating scores to medium and the reason being is that I have changed to another division. Duhh.. helloooo, I moved in February 2008, meaning that I completed the whole farrkking 2007 serving your stupid systems! Can u tell that I'm still angry?

Then, at the same time, I got pregnant. Yes, bun was in the oven, and I had 6 pregnancy bleeding incident due to the traveling back and forth that I had to do whilst handling the job at hand. I reached a point where even my doctor told me to do a 'cleanup' because she suspected that this could be an abnormal pregnancy and the bleeding were just to risky. But the Al-Mighty has proven that he is the most Merciful and most Powerful and thanks to Allah for my motherly instinct not to go ahead with the cleanup, but instead tawakkal and waited for another two weeks for the tiny little life to become perfect!

Feb 2008 - May 2008 ; sunshine on my window!
I moved to a new division, and lasted for only 2 months before I went on maternity leave!
Gave birth to another beautiful boy, Arif, weighing 2.93kg, and 50cm tall.. (recalling his brother Amin who was at 2.78kg and 51cm). Arif was born on 28th March, a day before my birthday. I was a much hurtful birthing experience because I was not able to take epidural due to the stupid nurse! I kept telling her that I'm having contractions at my back -same like my first delivery, I felt like my backbone was gonna snapped in half. But she kept checking for contractions up front on my belly and told me that the monitor didn't capture any readings. Hubby and I monitored the contractions together using his stop watch and after 5 minutes contractions gap felt, finally the nurse said "oh, it's already 7cm and there's no more time for epidural" .. sssshhhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiittttttt!! Can u tell how pissed off I was at that time!
I was given the laughing gas and dozed off while the nurse paged the doctor and prepared the room for labour. And the next thing I heard was Prof Siti saying "Ok, remove the gas. I want her to start pushing" and at that instance, semi-awake, I said to Prof "Why do u put your hand there?" (referring to my down-there part) .. and she said "My hands are here!" lifting both her gloved hands up high.. "That's the baby's head" she said.. and I was like "Oh" ..
Honestly, I can't remember exactly how it felt, but I do know that I was pushing according to doctor's timing and tears streaming down my cheek which hubby then rubbed it with his fingers, and felt like someone tearing me up down there, and then a sense of relief as he came out safely!

3 days after that I found out the company was doing another restructuring and I was once again, transferred to another team, which I seriously don't care as I was about to enjoy my two months of maternity leave! woott! woott!! :P

June 2008 - now ; like a newborn..
It's not only that I've gone through labour, but I too felt like a newborn!
New addition to the family, new life, new job and not to mention, new addiction too..
I'll talk about it later.. hopefully.. so, stay tuned! hehe..


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